If the idea of intimate roleplay sounds both super-hot and a little intimidating to you, you’re not alone. Roleplay allows you to become the sexy French maid, the muscular plumber, or the ready-to-ride cowgirl of your dreams, even if only for a little while. Wearing a sexy costume or lingerie can make roleplay feel deeply authentic and erotic. By taking on a new persona, you’re giving yourself permission to trade predictable intimacy for something much more exciting. But where do you start?

Before you jump into bed wearing your new sexy nurse costume, take some time to discuss your expectations with your partner. Tell them why you’re curious about roleplay, ask them to share their feelings about it, and decide whether roleplay is right for your relationship.

Talk About Boundaries

When you engage in roleplay, you’re allowing yourself and your partner to test out new words and actions. How will you feel if your partner wants to call you by a different name or try a new position during sex?

Be as clear as possible in establishing boundaries with your partner. Do you want your roleplay session to last 15 minutes or all night? Are you open to using toys and props that you don’t normally use during sex? The more you prepare for roleplay, the more likely it is to result in a positive experience!

Establish a Safe Word

You’re roleplaying as doctor and patient when suddenly the patient has a terrible leg cramp. Do they actually need to take a break, or is this your cue to slide in closer with your sexy stethoscope?

Before you begin your roleplay session, establish a safe word with your partner. Choose something short and memorable like “red” or “trust.” Either of you can use the word whenever you want to stop roleplaying.

Draw from a Hat

Choosing a roleplay “story” is challenging. What if you like the idea of roleplay but don’t feel confident enough to share your elaborate masseuse and masseur fantasy with your partner? Brainstorm a few roleplay ideas together, write them down, and put them in a hat. Choose your adventure!

Start Small

Don’t expect your first roleplay experience to be Oscar-worthy. Ease into roleplay by wearing a sexy costume the first time, introducing yourself by a new name the second time, and slowly allowing a story to materialize from there. The goal of roleplay isn’t to showcase your acting skills. It’s an opportunity to experience intimacy from a new perspective.

Keep an Open Mind

It’s normal to feel a little awkward about “playing pretend” with your partner. Give yourself plenty of time to find what turns you on. Maybe sexy lingerie is the key to success, or maybe the prisoner and guard scenario gets your blood pumping every time. Communicate, experiment, and remain open to trying new things.

Pause for Pleasure

At first, you may feel self-conscious and vulnerable during roleplay. Try to relax and remember that this experience is meant to feel good! Stop worrying about how you look in your sexy sailor costume and surrender to pleasure. How does your partner’s touch feel? Isn’t it exciting to pretend you’re feeling it for the very first time?

Now that we’ve covered the basics, here are sexy lingerie costumes paired with six sex roleplay ideas to wear during your next hot and steamy session!

French Maid Roleplay

You’re hard at work dusting the bookcase when a handsome stranger comes home early. You remove his coat and politely encourage him to take a seat while you finish up. Once you’re finished making your way around the room in your sheer apron and thong, it’s time to ask if there’s anything…anything at all…you can do for him before you leave.

Sexy Cat Roleplay

Get down on all fours and claw your way around the bedroom! You’re feeling wild, and your partner is the only one who can tame you tonight.

Hot Cowgirl Roleplay

Long days on the ranch can get a little lonely, but you’re used to occupying the quiet countryside with only your faithful horses. This evening starts to feel a little different when you see a stunning cowgirl dressed in a pink bralette and matching panties walking toward you. Her horse could use some rest, and she’s wondering if you’d like some company.

Gorgeous Gift Roleplay

This holiday has been perfect. A light snow has coated the ground by the time you’re finished exchanging gifts, but they’ve got one more special surprise for you. They emerge from the bedroom wearing only a red satin bow, and you know exactly what to do.

School Girl Roleplay

She’s spent hours studying, and now she wants to teach you a few lessons. Sit down and behave, or she might have to show you a little discipline.

Sexy Officer Roleplay

You’ve been bad, and it’s time to face the consequences. This sexy officer will have you on your knees begging for forgiveness!